iLost My Mind
by Xblue-seasX2000
Summary: Carly and Freddie discover that Sam has voluntarily checked herself into a mental hospital, Troubled Waters, thinking she has lost her mind for falling in love with her best friend. Now Carly, Freddie, Gibby, and Spencer have to bust her out of there. Can they get Sam out of the mental institution before they have to do iCarly? And does the gang know why she put herself in there?


Carly and Freddie discover that Sam has voluntarily checked herself into a mental hospital, Troubled Waters, thinking she has lost her mind for falling in love with her best friend. Now Carly, Freddie, Gibby, and Spencer have to bust her out of there. Can they get Sam out of the mental institution before they have to do iCarly? And does the gang know why she put herself in there?

**iLost My Mind**

"Er, er… Grr, ahh… mpf… Gosh!" Spencer said trying to squeeze into some skin tight skinny jeans.

"Um…" Carly said coming down the stairs from her bedroom. "What are you doing?" She asked slowly and curiously.

The older sibling stopped what he was doing and turned to face his little sister, "I, uh… I'm trying to get into these damn jeans, but there… so… freaking… tight!" The young adult said as he gave another hard tug.

"Uh, you do realize that those are my jeans?" The perky brunette said with a loving giggle as her brother just stared dumbfounded.

"Ha… yeah I, ah-I feel so stupid."

"Oh Spence…" Carly said still smiling.

"What goes on?" Freddie said coming through Carly's front door and swinging his backpack on the chair.

"Nothing. Hey did you hear from Sam yet? I'm worried, she like, just disappeared a couple days ago."

"I wish I knew. I wonder where she went, I ju-" Freddie stopped mid-sentence and stared at the taller man who was still struggling to fit in the pants. "Wah-" Freddie stopped what he was saying and just pointed a finger at in wonderment at Spencer.

"He uh, he's trying to fit into my jeans. And won't take them off." She said walking by Spencer and playfully slapping him on the arm. She grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge then stood behind the counter taking a sip.

"Dude why don't you just go take em' off?" The tech-boy said, throwing his arms in the air while walking over to his friend.

"Oh, I… I will do that now. Where's the butter and oil?" Spencer whined while hoping away down the hall.

"It's in the bathroom where you left it!" She yelled to him.

"Okay, so now what… about Sam?" Freddie asked.

"I'm not sure..." She said in puzzlement. The two friends stood there without an idea in their heads'. "Wait, you're smart. Can't you like track down her phone or something?"

"Oh yeah, but I need the password to her phone. You know it?" The boy said hopping on the seat and logging onto the computer.

"Yeah I do, its-" Carly was about to say it, but stopped.

"Well what is it?" Freddie asked looking up at his friend knitting it eyebrows together.

"It um, it's very dirty. I really don't wanna say it." Carly said pleading.

"Okay then ah, type it for me and I'll do the rest." He said moving the keyboard in front of his friend.

"Okay," Carly started typing, and then when she finished the last couple of words she looked away from the keyboard in disgust and put her finger in her mouth making gagging sounds.

"Wow, why would she do something that's gross enough to make you gag? I wonder what the heck her password is. Yet she is Sam and I shouldn't be surprised." Freddie giggled.

"Yeah you really don't wanna know." Carly said walking around to stand by the teenage boy.

After about a minute went by he was already tracking her phone down.

"Yes I got it!" He said excitedly.

"What? Really? Where is she?" Carly said getting impatient and tapping on Freddie's shoulder harder and harder.

"Ow! Relax you're hurting my shoulder." The sensitive boy said rubbing the spot where Carly caused pain.

"Sorry, just where does the thingy say she is?"

"It says," Freddie began.

"Troubled Waters?" The two say in unison scrunching their eyebrows at the screen and looking closer.

"What?" Freddie said in confusion.

"Why would Sam be in a mental hospital? Who would put her in there?" Carly said now getting frustrated.

They both ran towards the door and opened it to go on their search for Sam, but when they opened the door Gibby walked in.

"Hey Gibbs." Freddie said.

"What's up my peeps?" The chubby boy replied. "Where you guys goin'?"

"To a mental hospital." Carly said casually as if it was an everyday chore.

"Cool! Can I come?" Gibby asked with a huge smile plastered on his face.

"Uh, sure let's go." Freddie said.

The three friends traveled many blocks until they finally came to the front doors of the mental institution. They looked at each other than walked in and went to the front desk where a lady in a purple outfit was working on some papers.

"Um, hello," Freddie began as the woman looked up at him with a warm smile. "We're here to see Sam Puckett."

"Sorry, Sam asked to not have any visitors." The woman said looking back down at her papers and picking up a pen.

They walked away from the desk and looked at her.

"Now what?" Freddie asked.

"Gibby, create a distraction while me and Freddie sneak in and find Sam. You're good at those."

"Alright!" Gibby agreed getting pumped for his plan he already had in mind.

Freddie and Carly backed away watching for what their friend was about to do. Gibby ran towards the desk screaming, jumping over the front desk, and tackling the woman.

That was the best time for the two to run, and that's just what they did. They ran down the hall and saw that there were two hallways leading in two totally opposite directions. So Carly went one way and told Freddie to go the other.

Freddie wandered down the hall looking in each and every door. He went faster, and started to jog, hoping he would find Sam's room soon to find out what the heck is going on and especially why she's in there.

As Freddie opened another door he saw Sam. She was painting and looked like a happy child.

"Well hello Freddie. What are you doing here? Do you like my painting of a finger?" She asked calmly showing her painting to the boy in front of her.

"That's a… lovely painting Sam. Now tell me what you're doing here? Who put you in this mental place?" Freddie asked.

"No one did. I put myself in here." Sam answered going back to her regular stern voice.

"Wah… but why? Why did you… I mean." Freddie was at a loss for words.

"I put myself in here because I have gone MENTALLY INSANE!" Sam yelled beginning to cry.

"But, what have you done, or… why, I-I just. I don't get it. I don't understand Sam."

"Because I," Sam began, she knew she'd regret this and that they'd find out today about what's going on, but she decided to go right ahead and say it anyways. "I'm in love!"

"What?" Freddie laughed lightly, thinking that Sam, putting herself in a mental hospital for just this, is actually going mentally insane!

"Yeah I'm in love with someone I seriously shouldn't be in love with! Wait… what am I talking about I AM NOT IN LOVE! AHHH!" She started sobbing now, just crying hard as she fell on her knees and put her hand up to cover her face.

"S-Sam, Sam, it's okay seriously, okay you're not really in love, but just…. Please just tell me who it is, maybe I can sort this out and get you outa here so we can do iCarly in," Freddie said as he checked his watch, "In three hours, tonight." Sam just kept on crying.

"Don't you wanna get out of here?" Freddie continued in a softer voice.

Sam sniffled wiping the tears away and said, "Yeah, but…. But I just can't."

"Why?"

"Because I am mentally unstable and whatnot, I just, I can't go, I belong here! I don't know… I don't wanna face seeing her and-" Sam cut herself off hoping, and just praying that Freddie didn't hear her say that.

"Did, did you just say… what I think you just said?"

"N-no, what? I didn't say anything!" Sam said getting up and jumping on her bed.

"Yes… you did," Freddie followed. "You just said 'her' and… you love a girl?" Freddie asked already knowing the answer considering she just said it.

"Go ahead and just laugh okay Benson! That's why I'm here! That is why I am in a freaking mental hospital… because I am mental and need help!" Sam said screaming it at him. Clearly upset with her sexuality.

"No, no, no… please Sam, there is nothing, and I mean _nothing_ wrong with being lesbian! Come on Sam. It doesn't matter who you fall for. Love is love. It's not going to be easy, and there are going to be people in your life who will hate, but that's only because they have no life and just like to bring other's down and follow things written in a book that, well, even a random dude could have made. It's mostly fake in the bible especially section 18:22 or whatever it is in there… it's fake, the one about homosexuals. Please Sam." Freddie begged trying to convince her.

"How do you know what page in the bible homosexuality is on?"

"Because my mom she uh… she's a conservative republican." Freddie said.

"And that is…? What like a homophobic bitch or something?" She asked.

"Uh well… yeah pretty much, I guess you can say that." He replied.

"Then how come you don't believe what your mama has been teaching you?"

"Because… well yeah she did give me some of those straight, homo talk and I went to catholic churches all my life, and well I actually still do, and um… she, I just don't believe in that stuff, that it's bad to be gay."

"Well that's what you _believe_ Freddie, that's not what's true." The blond stated.

"I-I know, but I just don't see what's wrong with it, that's all, I mean if I had a gay friend and he liked me or not, just like if it was a girl, I'd be flattered, but I wouldn't go out with him unless I liked him… unless I was attracted to the masculine side you know, like guys." Freddie said.

"Oh, wow okay well whatever, Benson."

"Okay um, It's hard to explain, but listen, when you die later on in life when you're all old and wrinkly, and you go to Heaven and meet Jesus, then maybe he will show you or tell you the truth. Then maybe, you will know." Freddie said smiling. "But I know that's when you die so. Ha, yeah. But I just don't want you to hate yourself for _how you were born_." Freddie said emphasizing on the last words to get his point across.

Sam laughed and said, "I do believe in Heaven and God, but you are just a geek Benson." Sam said playfully pushing his shoulder and standing up in front of him.

Freddie stood up too and just smiled.

"Well," He said, "Did our little talk help?" He asked in a baby voice poking her stomach.

"No, but forget it for now, okay? I'll get out today; we'll do iCarly tonight, and forget this ever happened. Okay?" Sam asked, tears welling up in her eyes, but they quickly faded.

"Okay, but can you tell me who?" Freddie pushed, wanting to know the answer to his question.

Sam then got closer to the tech boy and hugged him.

"No and you really are a great friend Freddie. I love you dude." Sam said as he hugged her back. Freddie thought what a change in subject.

"Awe I know… I'm awesome and lovable!" Freddie bragged. "But, I never heard you say that before, ha. So let's get outa here." He said as he pulled away from the hug and started towards the door.

"Ah, ah, ah, not so fast kid." Sam said smiling.

"What?"

"You didn't say it back…" She said.

Freddie looked confused for a second, then, like a light bulb went off above his head, he remembered, "Ahh… Yes. I love you too buddy. And of course I'll never speak of this moment, ever!"

"Good."

As they were about to leave Carly opened the door and Sam's heart pounded against her rib cage, she opened her mouth so she can suck more air in, but instead it came out like a wheeze and for a second she couldn't breathe so she coughed a couple times and cleared her throat, then took a deep breath.

"Sam is everything okay?" Freddie whispered. He seemed like the only one who notice.

Sam just nodded.

Carly squealed in delight of finding her best friend and ran up to give her the biggest bear hug of all.

"Ah, gosh carls," Sam said as she was being squeezed so tight, while her arms dangled off to the side, not wanted to hug back. "I'm not a hugger… not a hugger… NOT A HUGGER!" Sam had to repeat it three times before Carly finally let her go.

"Oh sorry I forgot, but you really should hug more and eat bacon and ham less." Carly laughed.

"Yeah… no. Ham is my one and only true love. I love it so much." Sam said as she pulled out a piece of ham from her pocket and un-wrapped it.

The gang just watched.

"Uh, gosh Sam," Freddie said as Sam dug her face into all the meat.

"Let's go… wait outside." Carly said.

They waited outside and Sam opened the door with a long, deep burp.

"Ahh…" Sam said as she laid her hand on her stomach.

They then left and walked towards the door, but the lady at the front desk wouldn't let them leave.

The woman then hit the big red button on the side of her desk when the three tried to escape, then from the halls and a couple doors on the side, a group of police ran out and stood around the kids.

The gang didn't know what to do. They had iCarly staring in less than three hours and they had no way of getting Sam out!

"Um… what do we do now?" Sam whispered to her friend while they were all back to back.

"Uh, I have no idea." Freddie answered.

"What do yall children think you're doing trying to steal one of my patients?" Said the lady they saw earlier.

"Um, were not trying to steal her. You see we have a web show in about two hours to do and she's our friend so we were just going to take her and leave." Carly said with a smile.

"Na ah, she ain't leaving. I'm sorry sweetheart. Now you two leave. Bring Sam Puckett back to her room, please." The lady yelled at two men who worked in the building.

"But we need to do iCarly, it's very important!" Carly whined.

All of a sudden all of the mental patients who were sitting down in the lounge that the gang was currently in all looked up and one man asked about iCarly and said he was a fan. Than all of a sudden all of the patients started chattering at once about how they love ICarly.

It began to get extremely noisy.

"Okay, okay, QUIET!" A lady who worked there yelled. "Okay what's this all about people?"

Once the lady said that a man from the crowd stood up said, "Hey, that's the iCarly gang we love em' they are the best! You have to let them do their show, they need Sam."

For a second the lady considered it and answered, "Alright, fine… okay I will let the iCarly's do their show, Sam you have to sign a paper so I can let you out."

Once Sam signed the paper Carly started calling Spencer to bring all their equipment and he arrived with all the stuff about ten minutes later.

The gang did their show, but in the middle Freddie asked something on camera that got Sam a little pissed off at him.

"So Sam who put you in this mental hospital and like, why the heck did they do it?" He asked as Carly turned to look at her with the same confused face as Freddie.

Sam hesitated before speaking, "I put myself in here."

Everybody looked up at Sam at the same time; all with the same expression on their faces like they've smelled something toxic.

"Why?" Somebody from the crowd finally speaks after a moment of silence.

"Because," the blond pauses as if contemplating what lie to make up, but then she finally decides to let the truth out. "I'm in love!" She says loudly looking at the camera.

"With who?" Spencer asked from behind the camera.

"With someone I really shouldn't have feelings for. It's sick… and wrong. I feel awful and terrible about it. I wake up every morning thinking that God hates me and I've done him wrong. I go to bed every night hoping and praying that I will never wake up. But I do, I always do. I hate you fredward." Same finishes looking at Freddie with the evil eye after her little outburst.

"Do you like Freddie," Carly questions.

"No!" Sam yells, "I don't."

Carly walks closer to Sam touching her right shoulder giving her an, 'It's okay' look with a warm smile.

"Please Carly, just please don't touch me." Sam doesn't even look up at her. She doesn't want to look in her eyes and lose herself all over again. She wouldn't be able to control herself. That's kind of the reason why Sam has stopped having sleepovers with Carly. Carly has always been suspicious about it, but accepted her best friend's excused nonetheless.

Carly's hand remained on Sam's shoulder, but than this time her other hand reached up to touch her other shoulder. Carly stood right in front of Sam both hands still on her, cameras still rolling and more views by the second. People were insanely curious about what was going on.

Sam couldn't take it anymore, her blood was boiling her alive, her stomach was churning, and her body temperature must have risen because to Sam, it felt like her whole body was on fire, but it was a good feeling. Yes, it made her feel weak, but it felt like a good kind of weak.

Sam leaned it and crashed her lips onto Carly's.

_Sam's POV_

I didn't know how long I've been kissing Carly, but I couldn't breathe so I pulled away slowly, I looked her in the eyes. Finally I can do it without getting sick and extremely nervous! I didn't know what changed.

Oops! I forgot. I kissed Carly… my _best friend… _IN FRONT OF A LIVE CAMERA!

She just stared at me, mouth agape, and eyes wide. Then all of a sudden, something happens that gets my heart beating fast like drums again. Carly kisses me back! I didn't know what was happening at first, but it hit me like a ton of bricks after a second. She kissed me passionately and eagerly. I kissed her back too with just as much _want _and _need_. Her hands cupped my face as my hands landed on her beautiful curves, pulling her closer until there was no space, until our bodies were flushed up against each other.

We then pulled apart looking around at the people; I then pulled away from Carly and went behind Freddie feeling humiliated.

"And I guess… we're clear. End of um, this very… odd, different episode of iCarly, sorry about that guys. Leave a comment about it… anything really." Freddie said as he shut his camera off.

…

The gang finally got Sam out of Troubled Waters and they went back to Carly's apartment.

Spencer, Carly, and Freddie were sitting on the coffee table literally interrogating Sam while she sat on the couch in front of them.

They asked so many questions like,

"How long have you known you liked girls?"

"When did you start liking Carly?"

"Carly why'd you kiss Sam, do you feel the same way?"

It was a little annoying so I told them to shut it, than I answered everything they wanted to know.

"I've known since I liked Carly at seven years old or whatever. I liked her just little bit, but when I turned fourteen I realized the feelings grew and that I was in love with her."

They all looked at her in shock.

Then something they didn't expect to hear, was said, "I've been in love with Sam for three years, so since I was fourteen." Carly took a deep intake of air, holding it for a second, and then letting it out.

"Okay that's cool who wants spaghetti tacos!" Spencer yelled happily.

"Wait you're not mad?" Carly asked her big brother.

"Nope, I don't care at all, it's all good," he said with a smile, "But dad will be angry he sees iCarly all the time and you know, he is homophobic.

"I know, I forgot."

"My mom is too." Sam said.

There was a loud knock at the door and when Spencer opened it, it revealed an angry, homophobic, mom. That mom was Sam's mom. Spencer held his little sister knowing she might fight for Sam, but it'd be dangerous seeing that Sam's mom had a belt rolled up in her hands.

"You're coming home with me young lady. And you will get your cruel punishment that you deserve for this sick lesbo behavior. Say goodbye to Carly forever." She dragged Sam out and Sam didn't even fight back like she normally would have.

Freddie, Carly, and Spencer looked at the door in shock as their friend was being pulled away for good. Forever…

_And I didn't even get to say 'I love you' to Carly_, Sam thought sadly.


End file.
